Thursday, October 06, 2005

Depressed

It really sucks when you fail. It's just not a good feeling, even when you didn't think it would hit you that hard. I auditioned for Naked Voices, a really good a capella group on my campus and didn't make the cut. Auditioning was sort of a step out of my comfort zone for me, and having not had the right stuff I just can't help but wonder why. Did they not like my voice? If so, was it because I have a bad voice or just not the voice they're looking for? Was I off key at all, and if so did I show that I didn't have a good enough ear to cut it in an a capella group where I'm sure ear is everything? Did I not show enough enthusiasm? The desire to know just what I did wrong kills me. Obviously I know that there are people out there much better than me, but then why am I so curious about what I did wrong. I'm almost wishing I hadn't read the email tonight, because now I'm in this terrible funk when I have some really important shit that needs doing. It's almost as bad as the timing when I came out to my mom the day before a project was due. Talk about difficulty focusing.

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